Being pruned by the Master Gardener

Today was a bad day. 

I'm not talking about a can't-find-my-keys-and-I'm-already-late kind of day; but a gut-wrenching-sobbing-crying-out-to-my-Lord kind of day.  Were my cries for God to take away my fear and pain falling on deaf ears?  No.  Through His Spirit, he reminded me of an episode of "Ask This Old House" I had seen a few weeks ago (I know that sounds crazy, but just hang with me for a bit)...Professional landscaper, Roger Cook was showing a homeowner how to properly prune a sickly hedge and I believe this is also the way God, our Master Gardener was pruning me...

Don't use an electric trimmer - This method is quick and easy and gives a very groomed exterior, however the exterior of the plant grows so thick that light cannot penetrate its surface, leaving the inside brown and lifeless.  I, (like many people I suppose), want my transformation into Christ's likeness to be quick, painless and to be obvious.  I want people to see Jesus alive in my life--the groomed life, not the aching, struggling life--who would want that?  But God doesn't want to groom our exterior, he wants to plunge his shears deep into our hearts, removing areas that may seem alive, but are really dark and preventing further growth.

Use sharp, hand-held pruning shears - Using the right tool means clean cuts which will not injure the plant and allows for new growth.  Although God's pruning is often painful, it is never harmful.  God knows exactly what needs to be removed from my life in terms of control, attitude and stubborness.  These things will grow out of control and choke off any fruit that may be trying to develop.

Make cuts deep inside the plant to allow light to penetrate the surface and to foster new growth  -  God needs to cut deep so that His light will shine in our spirit and create the growth He knows is possible.  The homeowner in the ATOH episode asked, "Won't my hedge look like swiss-cheese?".  And that's what I feel like when God is using his shears in my life--exposed, full of holes where everyone can see the ugly browness underneath my green exterior.  I don't like being vunerable.  It makes me feel weak but trusting God means that He is strengthening me for longevity in His purpose.

Only remove about one-third of the plant at a time, be patient - Sometimes when I feel the Pruner's hand, I want it all overwith at once.  Ok God, if you need to prune, just take it ALL so I will never need pruning again!  Taking too much of the plant would harm it and it could die.  God will NEVER harm me with his pruning.  I know that my Lord loves me so much that He takes his time to groom me into Christ's likeness.  I am his work of art, not to be beautiful on the outside, but to be strong, vibrant and flourishing on the inside.  This is a cycle of pruning, healing, new growth, then more pruning.  Each time I allow him to work on my heart, I become stronger and more like Him.

Proper pruning creates uniqueness - Ever drive down the road and see "perfectly" groomed shrubs or trees and they look like large tennis balls, all the same?  Just grooming the exterior my produce an eye-pleasing look, but there is no uniqueness to those plants and underneath they are really dead.  God created me perfectly unique and so the way He prunes me will also be unique to me.  Transforming to be more like our Lord Jesus does not mean God wants us to be carbon copies of each other.  The gifts, talents and passions he gave me were His special blessings in my life, for no one else, just me.  So allowing myself to be pruned, not fighting against it will help me use those gifts, talents and passions for His purpose, not mine.  I imagine that He will need to prune certain areas again and again because my pride is like a fast-growing weed that doesn't allow his light to shine.

As my eyes swell from the seemingly never-ending flow of tears, I can feel the loving hand of my Creator perfecting me for His glory--Thank you Lord for loving me this much!

Thank you, SMSgt Reese

I just have to share a story about an event that happened this weekend that moved me in a powerful way, but first a little history...

On December 31, 2012 my husband Herb retired from 26 years of military service.  He enlisted in 1986 and spent 10 years in the Air Force--8 years stationed in Holland and 2 years stationed at Davis Monthan Air Force base here in Tucson before deciding to leave the Air Force.

Herb spent a year and a half as a civilian working as a computer store manager before deciding to join the Air National Guard.  He started as a "traditional" guardsman (one weekend a month, two weeks a year), then applied for a full-time position when one came available.  He was hired back into his old AF career field as a Munitions Specialist.  The bonus was that this position was classified as "Active Guard Reserve" (AGR) which meant that Herb was back on active duty and his 10 years of previous AF time would count towards retirement.  He knew that he would stay in until he was eligible to retire after another 10 years of service (20 years total service).

Everything was going according to plan and we both were looking forward to Herb's retirement.  Unfortunately when Herb was getting ready to submit his retirement paperwork, the economy took a nose-dive and without complaint, he immediately reinlisted.  He knew that preparing for a civilian career was going to be more critical than ever, so he also enrolled in ITT Tech's Computer and Electronic Engineering program.  Going back to school was not easy for him but his determination to succeed was unflappable and in August 2011 he graduated with is Associates Degree (with honors) and then his Bachelors Degree the following September.  I was so proud to share this milestone with Herb. 

Immediately after graduation Herb submitted his retirement paperwork with the ANG and began searching for a civilian job.  The economy was a bit better but there didn't seem to be many positions open in his new career field of electronics.  After a couple of months of promising leads that didn't pan out, we were trying not to get discouraged.  Finally in December 2012 Herb accepted a job with Accura Systems here in Tucson--unfortunately his retirement date was not until February 1st, 2013 and the company could not wait for him to retire to start working.  Herb did some quick negotiating and Accura agreed that he could work part-time to start (which would be mostly training anyway).  He then was able to switch to night shift at the Guard so he would work both jobs until retirement.

Herb was used to long hours after being in school for four years, but working two jobs and getting less than 4 hours of sleep a night started taking its toll right away.  He looked into the option of moving up his retirement date and wrote a letter to the base commander explaining the situation.  The commander agreed that Herb could move his retirement date to December 31, 2012!  That would save him a whole month of double shifts--praise God!

Herb was very excited to be getting out but the expedited date meant that his transition from the military would happen quickly and I was concerned that this momentous event would go relatively unoticed.  Due to the holiday schedule, his actual last day at the Air National Guard was Friday, December 29th.  We had a quiet celebration by going to dinner with my mom and step-dad.  I hoped to do more for him.  I evisioned a big retirement party with all our close friends, but with the holidays and the fact that we had just accepted a newborn foster-baby into our home on the 22nd, such plans were just not possible.

Fortunately, Herb's supervisor, Senior Master Sergeant (SMSgt) Reese had a plan...but first, some more history...

In September, the 162nd Munitions Storage Facility (affectionally known as the "bomb dump") got a new supervisor, SMSgt Reese.  So at the time of Herb's retirement he had only been the bomb dump supervisor for three months.

 Now I mean no disrespect to the previous supervisor, but he was more concerned with his own upcoming retirement than running the shop.  Morale had really bottomed out and Herb found it an increasingly frustrating work environment.  I do not want to belabor this point, just sufice it to say that things were really bad--at least until SMSgt Reese became the new supervisor.

So when Herb informed Sgt Reese of his new retirement date, SMSgt Reese asked if Herb would be willing to come back during January's drill weekend so that he could give Herb a "proper send-off".  So we went as a family to the ANG base this past Saturday morning.

When we arrived the whole shop was waiting for us and we gathered in one of the classrooms.  Without fanfare, SMSgt Reese called Herb to the front to present him with his retirement flag.  SMSgt Reese told Herb how much his dedication and service to his job was appreciated and how much his computer knowledge would be missed.  As he spoke, I could see a physical change come over Herb.  I could tell that he was genuinely touched by what Sgt Reese was saying.  These simple words of appreciation had both of us blinking back tears. (It may not seem like a big deal, but remember, Sgt Reese has only known Herb for three months and Herb's previous supervisor, who had been there for years, was not in the habit of acknowleging the hard work of his staff.)  As the new supervisor, SMSgt Reese was determined to make sure that Herb knew how much his service meant and that it deserved to be acknowledged. 

As SMSgt Reese presented Herb with his flag, he explained that when he had ordered the flag and box (from wherever they order such things), he was told that the government no longer gave flag boxes to retiring Guardsmen. 

So SMSgt Reese made one. 

An avid woodworker, SMSgt Reese used solid maple he had brought back from Virginia.  I imagine that he had plans for that wood, but sacrificed his own project to build my husbands flag box.  I was speechless.  Even now as I look at the flag, beautifully encased, I get choked up. 

But wait, there's more...

Then Sgt Reese presented Staff Sergeant Herbert Balli II the Meritorious Service Medal.  This is one of the highest honors a Guardsman can achieve.  Among other things, it says:

"...The singularly distinctive accomplishments of Sergeant Balli culminate a distinguished career in the service of his country and reflect great credit upon himself, the Air National Guard, and the United States Air Force."

Of course I'm exceptionally proud of Herb and his service to our country, however this story is not to glorify him but to express my sincere gratitude to SMSgt Reese for his kind words and for going above and beyond the call of duty to recognize Herb's accomplishments.  He did not have to do all the things he did and he even said that he wished he could have done more. 

SMSgt Reese, what you did do was so special to Herb and our family.  Words cannot express how much your simple words and act of caring will live on in our hearts--again, thank you.

But wait, there's even more...

After we left the bomb dump, we had to go to another office to check on Herb's retirement paperwork.  Across the hallway are the Commander's offices with a small lobby.  I happened to look over there and I saw SMSgt Reese.  He had changed from his BDU's to his "Dress Blues"--he was waiting to go before the promotion board. 

This amazed me because the "boards" are very stressful, especially for higher ranks where sometimes service members will interview four, five or six times before they are granted promotion.  In the Air National Guard, promotions are not that frequent because there has to be an open position before you can be promoted (unlike the Air Force where you can be promoted then transferred to a base that needs you).  SMSgt Reese again showed self-sacrifice by focusing on Herb's retirement instead of the promotion board.

The 162nd Munitions Storage Facility is very blessed to have SMSgt Reece in command.  It is my prayer that he will be rewarded with the promotion he is seeking (most likely Chief).  He is an asset to his unit and the Air National Guard.  I also hope that when he retires that someone takes the time to recognize his accomplishments.